Thursday, December 30, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 16

Day 16: Provide pictures of 5 celebrity crushes
Funny, I just spoke about this on the podcast not long ago. Here's my short list.

#1 - Jim Carrey
I always get laughed at when I mention him as my #1,
but look at him...he's very handsome + funny!

#2 - Johnny Depp

#3 - Shia LeBeouf

#4 - Liam Neeson

#5 - Will Smith

Saturday, December 11, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 15

Day 15: A letter to someone you wish you could meet
A letter to Paul McCartney
Dear Paul,
I've never met you (yet), but you actually changed my life this summer. I know that may come out sounding like I'm some crazy fan (and maybe I am) but this statement it true. For the past 10 years I've been suffering from drepression, with very few times that I was actually on a high part of life. It wasn't until I went to your concert this summer that I finally snapped out it this. You're music has always been a way to cheer me up and get me out of a rut, but it was once I saw you live that the black cloud lifted. I know this sound very strange, but there was an energy about the stadium. An enery I much needed.

Thanks for the years of entertainment and thanks for the therapy that no doctor could ever give me.

One of you biggest fans and clients ;-)
Nicole aka BeatlesDiva

Friday, December 10, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 14

Day 14: A song from your childhood

Oh so many songs come to mind! I've always had a love for music, but I remember having the neighborhood girls all get together and do performances of this song. Oh the good times!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 13

Day 13: Whatever tickles your fancy

Wow! This is a tough one. I could write of post anything I want. Hummm...I guess I'll just post a little something about me then.

I am a person that loves to help and comfort others in need. As much as I love to do this, it's mostly for a selfish reason. I do it because it gives me a chance to put aside my issues with life and forget about it for a few moments. I'm one that will keep my deepest feelings and thoughts hidden. Sure I'll bitch and moan about things in life (if you know me, you know of my complaining), but it's the BIG things that I keep buried. I've had many experiences in life and I'm willing to give my advice to others who may have questions or may be going through the same thing. I love to see that I can lift people spirts up and giving them a smile. That smile and sense of comfort gives me a glimmer of hope that I can change the things in my life.
I know this isn't the happiest of blogs I've put up, but it is something I needed to say. Thanks for listening!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 12

Day 12: Self portrait
Tis the season for Holiday pics!

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 11

Day 11: Share your favorite recipe

I love food and I love cooking so this is a tough one for me, so I'll do the recipe that I just did a couple of days ago.

Avocado and Lime Salsa
1 Packet Italian salad dressing mix (made according to package directions)
2 Avocados, peeled and diced
4 to 5 Roma tomatoes, diced
1 can white corn, drained
1 can black-eyed peas, drained
1/2 bunch cilantro, washed and chopped
2 to 3 limes, squeezed
7 green onions

Mix salad dressing in a large bowl. Place all remaining ingredients in salad dressing and toss. Serve with whole-grain tortilla chips.

Monday, December 6, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 10

Day 10: A letter to a person who has caused you pain
Dear ____,
I leave your name out because I don't care to let people know who you are, but they should know the story of us. I loved you more than I loved anyone else, in the end it was all a lie that you were playing. I was willing to give up everything for you, I was even at the point of packing up my things and moving for you. I was only but short putting my boxes in my car and headed out, until you called me and told me the truth. The truth that you just got married that week, leaving me and yet another girl broken hearted. How is it you can play not only me but three women at the same time?!?

You were good with your games and tales, making yourself out to be the perfect man and in my eyes you were. You were everything I wanted in a man and in the end, it was all a mirage. It's been a few years since I've even heard from you, but I find it hard still to forgive you. I did learn many lessons from our experience together, but unfortunately it's also given me a hard head in trust any other men that come into my life.

I hope you're happy with the decisions you've made in life and I pray that you're wife knows the true you so she won't end up broken like myself.
You're Ex

Sunday, December 5, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 9

Day 9: List some of your favorite blogs
I mostly follow personal blogs of family and friend, but sinceI don't think people would like if I posted their personal blogs on here, but here are some wonderful blogs of various subjects I love to follow.

The Journal of a Black Mormon Girl
Blind Squirrel Props
Cake Wrecks
Phantoms and Monsters
The Nerdsphere Network
(I help with this one)

Saturday, December 4, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 8

Day 8: A Photo of you taken recently
Here's a few that I've pulled off my Facebook profile.

Friday, December 3, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 7

Day 7: A YouTube video you find funny
Oh, I can't just put up one video. Here's a short list of ones I can always go back to for laughs!

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 6

Day 6: A list of what you ate today

* Mountain Dew & Cheetos (there's the breakfast of champions)
* Hot ham and cheese
* Danish
* Chicken and penne-pasta stir-fry
* Milk and a gingerbread cookie
* A piece of white chocolate and a after dinner mint

I honestly don't eat that much in a day, it's mostly junk that I can find at work where most of my snacking is done. Once I get home, it's mostly water, milk and some meat for dinner.


Rated R
117 Minutes
Nicole’s Rating: A-

Finally, a movie that Nicholas Cage doesn’t totally annoy me in! I have to admit, this was one action movie that I wasn’t really wanting to see. When people told me the storyline, it sounded like nerdy children in costumes, who cussed a lot and were needing attention. Boy was I wrong! Yes, it had the nerd gets the girl storyline, but it also had a fairly in-depth superhero tale. Yeah, yeah there were some fairly predictable parts and you’ll see it coming if you’ve seen more than two comic book hero movies, but there were a couple of areas I was not expecting.

The casting was nearly perfect and overall the chemistry of the players was spot on, despite some cheesy lines with googly teenagers. The one issue I had with the movie was some of the unfinished CGI effects at the end of the movie. That could have used a little tweaking or better yet, maybe a different plot device.

In the end, I had a lot of fun watching this show and it’s one that I can imagine watching a few times over and not get bored.

Monday, November 29, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 5

Day 5: A letter to your crush
I honestly don't have a crush on anyone at this moment in life. I've made myself 'unavailable' at the moment until I can't get some of my personal stuff in order first. But, I'll write a letter about a guy that I fell hard for a few years ago.
Dear ______,
When we first met I knew there was something extra special about you and it was only a matter of time before I fell in love with you. We grew so close, even to the point that my father was asking me about you on a daily basis. Unfortunately my feelings for you were not mutual as I walked in with you and your ex-girlfriend cuddling up on the couch. I was heart-broken like no other, but in time I was able to cut those strings of romance for you and was able to still share my friendship with you. I know we are not extremely close these days, since you have a family and a very busy career, but in the end I’m very happy to still can you a friend. Thanks for the great times!
Loves & hugs,
~ Nic

Sunday, November 28, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 4

Day 4: A photo of you taken over 10 years ago
As most of you know I'm a sucker for photos, so I'll give you a few of me growing up.

Christmas 1977
(just turned one)

My sister and I at Thermopolis Hot Springs
7 years old

Homecoming 1991
My sister was a Senior, I was a Freshman

First time in Hawaii

Christmas 2001
(I used to to be skinny and sweet looking)

Friday, November 26, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 3

Day 3: Your favorite movie
The Fall
official movie site

I've done extensive reviews about my favorite movie and I can go on and on talking about it. I've said it before, this movie is nearly perfect in my eyes. The only fault is it's rating. It has been given a -R- rating which is sad, because it's does not deserve that rating. I spent days trying to find out why it was given a rated -R- because there's only one or two curse words, slight violence and no sexual content whatsoever. Not even kissing!

Come to find out it's because the main character takes a handful of pain killers in front of a minor. Because this is considered drug abuse in front of someone under 17, it gets this rating. Please by no means skip this movie because of it's rating. If you like 'Princess Bride', you'll find joy in this film.

Tarsem does a great job picking out the most beautiful, most colorful locations and not one pixel of CGI was used in this film. All the landscapes are natural and all the special effects were on set. Check out the trailer, then go and watch the film. I'd love to here what you think about it.

Here are the link to my previous reviews:
Blog Review
YouTube Part 1
YouTube Part 2

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 2

Day 2: A bulleted list of everything that happened in your day

4:00AM - First alarm goes off and the snooze war begins.
4:15AM - Second alarm goes off that the snooze war is still in progress.
4:30AM - Finally get off of bed and into the shower
5:00AM - Left extra early for work due to the snow storm.
6:00AM - Clocked into work and the data entry entry begins
6:05AM - Listening to WTF@TFW podcast
9:00AM - Listened to Nightside Project podcast
10:00AM - Lunch time with the gals
12:30PM - Listen to some tunes
2:30 PM - Clocked out of work
2:35 PM - Hung around outside chatting it up with friends
3:00 PM - Made business phone calls
3:30 PM - Played with the dogs
4:00 PM - Skyped call with my UK friends
5:15 PM - Chatted with the family
6:00 PM - Dinner
7:00PM - Downloaded new audiobook
7:30PM - Here typing this blog.

I live a boring day to day life, but exciting things do happen now and then.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

All About Me, in 50 Days or More - Day 1

My friend Bobbie put this up on her blog and I'm loving getting to know her in this special way. I hope that many others will follow the trend along with me. Sometimes life gets crazy and we forget to stay in touch with all the wonderful people we know. So here's a great way to view your friends in a whole new light.

Wish me luck! I’ll do my best to post daily, here’s what you can look forward to:

Day 1: Introduce yourself
Day 2: A bulleted list of everything that happened in your day
Day 3: Your favorite movie
Day 4: A photo of you taken over 10 years ago
Day 5: A letter to your crush
Day 6: A list of what you ate today
Day 7: A YouTube video you find funny
Day 8: A photo of you taken recently
Day 9: List some of your favorite blogs
Day 10: A letter to a person who has caused you pain
Day 11: Share your favorite recipe(s)
Day 12: Self portrait
Day 13: Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 14: A song from your childhood
Day 15: A letter to someone you wish you could meet
Day 16: Provide pictures of 5 celebrity crushes
Day 17: A photo that makes you sad
Day 18: Set or share a goal
Day 19: Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 20: A letter to someone that changed your life
Day 21: Your favorite television program
Day 22: A photo that makes you happy
Day 23: Share one of your favorite tunes
Day 24: Time to face morph
Day 25: Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 26: Favorite books
Day 27: A talent of yours
Day 28: Favorite places to shop
Day 29: Your favorite color
Day 30: The friendliest person you knew for only 1 day
Day 31: Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 32: A photo you took
Day 33: What you’re craving right now
Day 34: Your favorite quote
Day 35: A letter to an ex
Day 36: Some hobbies of yours
Day 37: A song that you like to dance to
Day 38: A photo of your parents
Day 39: Zodiac sign and do you think it fits your personality
Day 40: A deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 41: Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 42: A bad habit you have
Day 43: A picture of your favorite place in the world
Day 44: Something that fascinates you and why
Day 45: A letter to yourself a year ago
Day 46: Photos of personal things in your life (pets, family, house, etc)
Day 47: Birthday wish list
Day 48: A photo of you right now
Day 49: Hopes, dreams, and plans for the next 365 days
Day 50: A letter to your reflection in the mirror

Day 1: Introduce yourself

I was born Nicole Dawn Hale on December 14, 1976 to two wonderful parents, Ron and Eve. Along with this package of parents was included an older sister, Tiffany, who some days didn't want a baby around. Over time my sister and I have grown to love and care for each other. Just last month she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, Cassidy Lynn Marshall-Hale, making me an aunt for the first time and I couldn’t be happier for her and her partner Natalie!

I'm a very social person and have a love for meeting new people. Some know me from forums by either BeatlesDiva or Hailstorm. I have no problems talking to strangers, I actually find it quite inviting. Everyone has a story and I’m one to listen to it.I’m a person who hasn’t really stepped out of the stage of childhood when it comes to my interests. I still love cartoons, Lucky Charms, staying up at all hours of the night talking to friends, taking funny pictures with the camera and of course I still love to play dress up. I love any excuse to put on a costume and do funky hair and make-up.

I have a love of music! If you have known me for more than 30 minutes, you know I have a somewhat unhealthy obsession with The Beatles. I love the music from the 60's and 70's mostly but I love any genre. I even have to admit and I have recently put some Country on my iPod. I’m going to give it another shot. I studied music while in college and actually got a scholarship for it. I changed my degree around so many times I have classes in just about every area of study, but the first thing I studied was Opera. That’s right Opera! Then I came to realize there’s not much demand for Opera singers these days.

After attending college I went onto a trade school where I studied to be a travel agent. There is nothing I love move to do than to travel, so this was the best career for me. I loved being a travel agent, but 9-11 came along and changed everything.

I’ve done several jobs…SEVERAL, but I have stayed at my current job for nearly six years now working for the Postal Service. It’s a job that does drive me up the wall, but the pay is better than most and it’s a job I don’t have to worry about once I leave for home.

I’m a very open and honest person, most say (especially my mother) that I’m TOO open and honest. I’m sorry, but I just tell it like it is.

Well, there’s the start of getting to know me. Hope you enjoyed it and look for more to come along!

Sunday, November 21, 2010


Rated R
107 minutes
Nicole's Rating: C+

This is one movie I really wanted to see on the big screen and I wish I had. The scenery and cinematography was the best thing this movie had going for it and would have been fun to see at a larger scale. But of course you can never go wrong when filming in Hawaii.

Big actors came into play and most of them did a good job, but then most of the well known actors came in and played the type of roles they are known for. The biggest annoyance though was Adrian Brodey's voice. What was he trying to do? Trying to pull off a Christian Bale Batman type thingy?!? I personally like the minor characters; Oleg Taktarov as Nikolai and Louis Ozawa Changchien as Hanzo. My favorite fight scenes of the movie where performed by these two characters.

I wish they would have put more of the Predator vs. Predator storyline in and told us more of the difference of the two races and I did enjoy the new looks and new weapons of the creatures.

Overall the movie felt a bit rushed at the end and left me with a few questions, but overall it kept me entertained.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween!

As most of you know, I'm a HUGE fan of Halloween and this year is no exception. I took it to the extreme with the celebrating as I made every excuse to dress up in different costumes. But my creme-de-la-creme was Goldilocks after she ran into the three bears. It's an idea I've had for a couple of years and decided, this was the year to do it.

I hope everyone else had a wonderful and fun Halloween just as I did.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Random Fandom - Episode 4: It's a Killer!

The latest of my podcasts are up and ready for listening. Slick and Nic have a great time chatting about movie monster of their childhood as well as bring you the news of entertainment. Hope you enjoy!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Cassidy Lynn Marshall-Hale

Cassidy Lynn Marshall-Hale
Born October 6, 2010
3:49 PM
3 lbs. and 13 oz.
16 inches long
I'm an aunt for the first time and I'm loving it. I've never seen or held Cassie yet, but I have so much love her. Even though this lil' girl is small she has a very strong spirt and will not give up on getting out of the NICU. All the nurses says she's very fissty, kinda like her mom Tiffany.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Our first official episode. I think we may get this down before episode 10.

Check us out at these locations:
My friend and I thought we'd give podcasting a try. Here's to our pilot episode.
Check us out at these locations:

Monday, July 5, 2010

Rejection after Rejection…My Mental Therapy Blog

The following blog will be long and quite personal from me. I’m sorry if it sounds like a lot of bitching and moaning, but this is what I need right now. Any advice is welcomed, but please leave the harsh criticism out. I honestly can't handle that right now.

Many of you follow me on Facebook and/or Twitter and most of you know that lately I’ve been in a bitter mood, but most do not know why. The reason why is that if I start talking about stuff I’ll start crying and I don’t want to put that kind of emotion strain on others. I have some people in my life that I call my “Emotional Vampires”; these people are ones that take up so much time and effort because they need so much attention that it is emotionally draining to one’s soul. After dealing with such folks, you honestly don’t want to be around anyone else or even think of your own issues. Because I deal with so many of these vampires, I keep many of my feelings locked up because I do not want anyone else to have to deal with this exhausting process. But here and now on this blog, I’m taking the time to get it all out in the open.

Rejection #1 - My Job
Rejected by Employer for Career Status

This is the one thing I have no problem gripping about as most of you know. I just wish that more people knew how frustrating that place is. Some of you work there or have worked there and do know what hell it truly is. First all I’ve been there for over five years now and I’m still classified as a temporary employee. How so? Well every 6-9 months my work fires us then rehires us five days later. This is so they don’t have to give us T.E. (transitional employees) any benefits. There are people there who are considered Career employees. These people do the EXACT same job as me, but they don’t have to worry about any disciplinary actions or even working to get their stats up, because they’re home free, meaning it’s hard to get them fired. Oh these people that do the exact same job as me, get paid twice as much, have benefits and vacation. Yeah, that’s fair isn’t it?!? Good ol’ government work. Like I said before, the more I work for the government the less confidence I have in it. Plus, I’ve been having issues with my paycheck and I can’t get anyone to help me because I’m not a Career employee. H.R. is impossible to get to because they are literally blocked off from the rest of the building. Yet again, that does not make any sense to me?!? I’ve asked several people in the building how I can become a Career employee and each time not one person, not even the big wigs, can give me a straight answer.

Rejected because I can’t get a straight answer or help from work.

Rejection #2 -My Weight and My Health
Rejected by My Own Body

This is probably my biggest reason for my depression and has been for years now. About five years ago I was diagnosed with P.C.O.S. (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome). It seems this is becoming more and more a problem with women these days, but that doesn’t mean that doctors know anymore than they did a few years ago. I was diagnosed with this when I went to the doctor because I was gaining extreme weight in hardly any time. Truth be told, I gained 60 pounds in less than seven weeks. Then because of this I gained another 15-20 due to the depression over it. Yep, I gained nearly 80 pounds in less than three months time. Since that time, I’ve been to several weight loss clinics, tired just about every over the counter weight loss drug and diet plan, had a personal trainer and dietitians and many doctors who put me on clinical drugs. I’ve even tried the expensive HCG diet that many of my friends are finding successful. As of today, I’ve cut my caloric intake to 800 calories or less, and go to the gym at least an hour a day. My success rate in the past four years: a whole whopping 10 pounds and several thousands of dollars in debt.

Along with the weight gain with P.C.O.S. comes the lovely girly issues…*WARNING AGAIN* OB/GYN stuff is being mentioned. Oh good ol’ hormones! I wish many days I was a man so I would have to deal with such crap! I have had major girly issues since I was 13. You’d think after 20 years that at least one doctor could figure out how to fix me. Well, in April I finally got to go to an expert and it only took me 10 months to get in to see her, even she said she’s never seen a case like mine. Two months later, with many, many, many uncomfortable tests (not to mention the cost) they came to the conclusion that I’m all sorts of messed up. One physician even said “Huh, you have an interesting set up here”. Yeah, just what every woman wants to hear while on your back in stir-ups! Apparently I have extra parts to my system, hence why I’ve been so messed up since I was young. In the end my main doctor told I just have to have my body works things out for itself, while being on hormone therapy, get a hysterectomy or try several experimental surgeries.

This is the main thing that sends me crying to sleep each night. There has never been such horrible news given to me in my life than the words “You most likely will never be able to have children”. The only thing I have ever know about my life is that I wanted to have children and to know that I may never have that experience sends me into the biggest spiral of depression. The doctor has given me some options, but they are not guaranteed. Even though it’s not likely, I have taken up these options. There’s no way that I’m giving up the chance to have children! Hence, many surgeries are in my future.

Rejected for child bearing because I have messed up innards.

Rejection #3 - Insurance
Rejected by a Company I Pay A Lot of Money To

This goes kind of with the last category. Well, with my health issues many surgeries are in the planning and one of them is Gastric Bypass. This is not a surgery I ever thought I’d have, but with my extensive tests and three doctors opinions, each told me that the only way that I can or will ever lose the weight most likely through this surgery. This is because my body is holding onto hormones in my stomach that rarely get released. So my body is holding onto the fat and other hormones as if I was in starvation mode. To get my body to lose weight, the doctors have to cut that portion of my stomach out. That’s basically why I have to get Gastric Bypass. But, even with three doctors with drawn out letters, tests and recommendations, my insurance still is giving me the run around and told me it’ll be at least 12 weeks for the decision and even then I may get rejected for the surgery.

Guess I just have to get used to being a fat pig the rest of my life.

Rejected because it’s insurance. Insurance companies always screw you over!

Rejection #3 - Dating Relationships
Rejected by the Opposite Sex

No surprise here about this issue, hence the “single” status. There’s nothing as enjoyable as being a 30+ year old single woman living in Utah (hope you picked up on that sarcasm there). I did give up on dating for a few years, because of my extensive track record with such winners (as I call them) “The Rapist”, “The Con-Artist”, “The Secret Agent”, “The Preacher” and “The Druggy”. Yep, this is a small list of such winners I’ve ended up with and they were as lovely as they sounded. The last true relationship I was in was with the man I was unofficially engaged to (no ring, hence unofficial in Utah standards). He ended our relationship by telling me he just got home from his Honeymoon. Yep, he was engaged to me and not just one, but two other women. So when people tell me “You’re just picky, you need to lower your dating standards”, I just look at them and wonder; “How much lower can I get”? I guess I can date the homeless or check under the rugs.

I know this may come to some as a shocker, but I do go out on dates now and then and each time I come home and either cry or just stare up at the ceiling in shock and awe about these men. Most of these men have extreme baggage, but hey, I’m not one to judge too much, I’m willing to give anyone a chance. I’ve come to the conclusion that these men only want sex or a woman around so they don’t have to pay for day care, nothing of a true romantic relationship. I’ve told many people out there most men don’t want a woman like me. I’m kind of like the “Clearance Model”. Either I’m too old, too fat (this is #1 I’m positive), too childish or the guy doesn’t want to have any more children. That’s my biggest deal breaker. I’m not going through all these tests and surgeries for nothing, but with most men my age, they’re done having children or they’re old enough to know that they never want kids. Guess I’ll get back into dating when I’m 50.

Rejected because I’ve passed my prime dating period.

Rejection #5 - School and Continuing Education
Rejected by Government Grants and Loan Companies

I never heard of anyone getting rejected for a student loan, that was until 3 weeks ago that I got a letter saying I didn’t qualify for a loan. Then two days later, yet another rejection notice came my way. These rejections came after I gave up on applying for government grants. One grant I applied for was actually through the school. The lady there told me I have a 96% chance of getting this grant. She’s never seen anyone turned away from this grant that was over 30. Well, I fit into that 4% category. I was denied because I am single with no children and have too much disposable income, which comes off as ironic to me since according to my taxes records from last year, I’m on the poverty line. I understand not getting grants because of my “lifestyle”, but why am I being denied loans? I have a great credit score and good history on paying my bills. I even have my car as collateral. My friend told me that it’s because the economy is down and private companies and being finicky with loans. That once it picks back up, my chances are a lot greater. I guess that’s good news, but I don’t see the economy picking up anytime soon. Do you?

What really hurt my self esteem was at the beginning of the year when I applied for a Helicopter school, so that I can become a Life Flight pilot. This is what I would love to do for a career, but again…rejected. Why? Because of my weight. Again this damn weight is ruining my chance for something great. Helicopter pilots need a weight limit and I’m way over that limit. So until I can get into that range, this dream job is put on hold.

Rejected because of my lifestyle.

Rejection #6 - Jobs and Career Advancements
Rejected by Employers and Companies

Because I honestly can’t stand my job anymore, I’ve been job hunting. If there is anything I hate the most in life it’s the frustrations with job hunting. I rather be someplace I hate than job hunting, but that place of work is so exasperating right now, I rather job hunt. I’ve probably applied for about 100+ jobs in the past 2 months and haven’t even heard from a ¼ of them. What ones I do hear from, they just send a generic letter saying I didn’t get the job. One place did respond back to me saying they were looking for someone fresh out of the school that has the potential of staying with the company for a long period of time. Sounds like an age discrimination thing, but I don’t have the energy or care to fight it. Most of rejections are because I don’t have the advanced degree or schooling for it, even though I have the experience most want that piece of paper aka diploma saying I can handle it.

Rejected because of Schooling

I really do try to stay optimistic about life, but lately it’s easier said than done. A person can only take so much negativity in their life before the little black clouds becomes a thunderstorm. It hit me the other day (literally) when I got an email from one of my “emotional vampires” and that was what throw me over the edge as I took a chair and threw it across the room. My frustration at the end of the days usually ends with me hitting myself, screaming into a pillow or crying myself to sleep. I hate this person I’ve become. I’m violent, hateful, filled with rage and jealousy of others. I don’t blame people for not wanting to be around me. I know I wouldn’t want to. I truly feel sorry for my co-workers and family who have to be around me. I’m sure they try to avoid me at every chance, that is until I can shake this gloomy feeling. I just want something to go right with life, just a little glimmer of hope that there is something good coming my way. I feel like I’m stuck in a corner with life and walls are starting to cave in. Damn this depression!

I honestly think I’m bi-polar or suffer from manic depression because I do have highs during the day, but they don’t compare to lows I experience. One reason why I have been avoiding people is because I honestly can take their good news. When someone tells me that they’re getting married, having a baby, got a job promotion or even got a fun little item I truly am happy for them at first, but within a few minutes envy and jealousy streams through my system and I find myself hating that it couldn’t be me. "Why can’t I have this? Why can I never share good news"? I feel like I’m trying so hard to make a better life for me, but I’m going nowhere. Maybe this is where I am supposed to be for now. If that’s the case, I think I’m going to need more chocolate.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Real World Iacon...That's My Voice!

As most people know, I'm about a geeky as they come. Needless to say, I'm proud of it too! As part of my geekiness, I'm a pretty involved member of the Transformers community (go on ahead a laugh, but again I love it). Well about three months ago a fairly well know voice actor asked me to help with this year's BotCon video for amatuers. Jon is such a talented man, I'm surprised he asked me to help him. I was very happy he asked me, but very surprised too. I wasn't able to go to this year's BotCon celebration, but in the end, we won the competition and Jon was able to take in the big moment there in front of thousands.

The video is about Well known Transformers living in a "Real World" situation. Even if you're not a fan of Transformers, it's a great laugh!

YouTube Linkage
Jon Bailey: The Man of a 1000 Voices.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Twitter Sucker

Yes, I've finally joined the rest of the sheep and signed up for a Twitter account. Not sure how to use it or why yet, but it's where some good gossip comes about. Me being so social, I have to be part of the "in crowd". So follow me and my 160 character messages.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

England Bound...Again

So as of last night it is official...I'm headed off to England again! Last year I hardly had any time there. I spent just about as much time travelling to get there as the time I spent there. I loved my short vacation but this August it's going to be better. I'm actually going to spend some time with friends in their hometown in Newcastle where (if I can do some sweet convincing) I'll get to go see where the castle that they use for Hogwarts in the Harry Potter film. I'm so excited to meet up with my buddies again. A year is a long time to see people you've grown so close with! But I'm also very excited that I actually get to see more of the British ways. I just hope they can handle a home-spun American gal like myself.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Who Say’s I Can’t Claim the Title of “Mom”?!

Mothers Day’s just passed and I hope all mommies everywhere got to celebrate their special day. Looking back just on the past week alone, I realize I can claim the title of Mom. I may have not given birth or official adopted some individuals, but I treat and help raise these adults as would any mom would.

There as a few people in my life, who are fairly close to my age that I claim as my kids (or should). I pick them up to and from work and activities, I go to support their performances and games, check on where they will be for the rest of the day, handed out allowances, I’ve even packed a few lunches, then if I have time I go and visited a friend in the hospital. I’ve actually been to see them more than their real family, all of this in a week’s time.

Then of course there are my puppies, who I do claim as my children, and I beg to differ to anyone that they are not kids. I have to disipline them, bath them, entertain them, make sure they get to bed the same time every night, I take them to the doctors and make sure they have a happy life. Plus, I'm sure I spend more money and time with them than some other mothers do with their own kids.

As much as I love helping others, this week I felt the stress of motherhood like no other, as my muscles are so tense that I can barely move my head back and forth. To all my friends who claim the title of “Motherhood” I salute you!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

It's been a long time since I've written, but I could let the day pass without telling all the mommies and adopted mothers a HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! It's your day and I hope y'all get spoiled.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Most people know that I love holidays, especially the ones where I get to dress up. Today being St. Patty's Day, I can't help be go all out in green, green and more green. I even did two variations on my looks. So fun!

I hope everyone has a happy and safe holiday celebration and may the luck of the Irish be with you!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Happy New Year...Again

Man! I remember those good ol' days when I used to blog almost every other day and now I’m lucky if I do it once a month. I wish I could say that my months are filled with fun and excitement, but mostly my life is boring and full of routines. But that’s all going to change…hopefully.

Yes, it’s New Year’s again! With that statement you probably think I’ve lost it, but oh contraire…it’s the start of the Chinese New Year and the time of year when I make my resolutions. It gives me a few more weeks of preping myself. I’m doing the same thing as most and starting a diet/health plan that my doctor has put me on. I hope this one finally works. I need to look somewhat good when I head to San Diego in May. My other resolution is to get on a decent sleep schedule. Right now my body is so wacked out from sleep deprivation; I honestly think that one reason why I’m overweight and depressed a lot. NO MORE! It starts tonight, at least I hope so.

And I could leave y’all with the mention of Chinese New Year and not give you what this year means, me being the Astrology geek that I am.

February 14 marks the start of the Chinese New Year, the year of the metal. What significance does the tiger have for the fate of the New Year? Headstrong, dangerous, and at times rash, the tiger endows a year with uncertainty and danger, according to the Chinese zodiac.

Consisting of 12 animal signs (rat, ox, tiger, rabbit, dragon, snake, horse, goat, monkey, rooster, dog and pig), and five elements (metal, water, wood, fire and earth), each combination occurs every 60 years. The last year of the metal tiger, February 1950 to February 1951, was tumultuous. The Korean War began, Senator Joseph McCarthy started his “witch-hunt” for communists, and US president Truman ordered the construction of the hydrogen bomb. According to Chinese mythology, metal does not go well with the tiger. In other words, 2010 will not be a quiet or peaceful year.

Due to the tumultuous nature of tiger years, success is said to only be obtainable if you act quickly and are proactive in life. Throughout the history, tiger years are associated with turmoil, political and social instability. That is why 2010 is expected to be a challenging year. Another reason for this is a metal element, which is not a very compatible element for the tiger, say Chinese astrologists. Tiger prefers wood and fire. This year is expected to be a tough year and parents who believe in Chinese astrology should observe caution.The Year of the Metal Tiger is expected to be relatively more unsettled and challenging compared with 2009.

The country (USA) will also experience a relatively modest economic growth compared with the Earth Ox in 2009 where it recorded a negative economic growth. Year 2010 is a Metal Tiger or Metal over Wood and since metal attacks wood it indicates it is a turbulent or unsettled year for our country and the world at large. In particular, there will be an increase in social unrest, more political uncertainties and turbulence, and natural disasters.

Overall, sectors or industries represented by the elements of Metal and Wood will experience healthier growth than other industries. Industries represented by Fire and Earth will experience a modest growth while those related to the Water element are likely to experience slower or below average GDP growth for the Metal Tiger Year compared with last year.On the local stock market front, it will be range-bound but on an upward bias, particularly in the first half of the year, with a tendency to consolidate in the second half of 2010.

Although predictions for 2010, based on the Chinese horoscopes, vary, the underlying message of Chinese New Year is one of peace and happiness for everyone.

Monday, January 4, 2010

It’s a New Year

I know I’ve really been out of the loop with a majority of my friends and I’m truly sorry, but for some reason I just don’t have the energy these days to be social. I know me…not being social!?! But I finally have a day off and I get to look back on 2009. Yeah it had its major down times, but it was bombarded with some great times that kick the bad times in the butt!

2009 started off with me going down to Las Vegas a few times to see my sister in the hospital which was probably the worst thing that happened to me personally in the year. I hated to see her is so much pain and discomfort, it just broke my heart, but seeing Tiff at Thanksgiving, she looks like she’s taking a slow but good recovery. I also quit my job with a boss I truly adore.

I still miss everyone I worked with at the Document Group, but I quit so I could go on a once in a lifetime trip to Australia and New Zealand. I got to go see the Opera House in Sydney and play with the local wildlife and the people were just amazing.

Once I got back home about a month later, I started to plan my next trip which was to England. I had too much fun in Birmingham playing with my fellow geeks and nerds. Next time I need to spend more than 4 days there!

But the day before I left for England I got the best things that happened to me this year. I got my beautiful Westie twins Nuke and Tazer. These two light up my life everyday!

Once back from England I got to plan yet another trip, this one to Las Vegas, but not for another hospital stay. I got to play with a couple of my girlfriends April and Ashley. I haven’t seen Ashley in years so it was great catching up with her. The best thing was when Ash was being harassed by the Coca-Cola bear. So funny!

Then onto Halloween. I love this holiday. I can honestly say it’s the only holiday I truly look forward to. I elaborate on my rotting corpse which made it “extra special” one can say.

After Halloween, not much happened, mostly due to the overtime at work. As much as I complain about that place, I’m very grateful that I have it. I know so many others that for their Christmas presents from work, they got laid off.

This year I’ve learned to stay in touch with friends old and new, tell your loved ones you love them each time you see or talk with them and don’t let life get in the way of finding new places to venture to, even if they’re all in your imagination.

Here’s to making 2010 the best yet!