Emotional Roller Coaster

My life lately has been filled with so many ups and downs, twists and turns, I’m literally making myself sick. After my last blog talking about how I’m making some decisions and changing my life, with into two days everything I decided on hit me like flaming bag of poop thrown at my face.

I thought I FINALLY had everything worked out: my vacations, my work situations, my decisions on school, etc. After booking my flights, cars and hotel rooms for my trip to Australia and New Zealand I had to give my boss two weeks notice that I was leaving to go on this trip for 4+ weeks. It was 48 hours later that I got notified that the trip has been cancelled because the job there was cancelled. The job is only for 2 weeks, but I planned on another two weeks vacation there. So needless to say I’m out money no matter if I don’t go or if I reschedule everything. Plus, I quit my job for this trip!

After a few days of mopping around I did find out the trip was rescheduled for the end of April. Yeah, I get to go on a trip. I still need to rebook everything because I honestly don’t want to spend the money on the exchanges yet. Unfortunately after speaking to a neighbor that’s from Queensland, she said well that’s usually when it floods there. ARGGH! Oh well…If I do end up finally going I’m going to enjoy it even if I’m walking waist high in water. But if I do stay as long as I planned, that means I have to cancel my trip to California to go to BotCon. So far my “Year of Travel” isn’t working out too well.

So I’ve been very nervous about what I’m going to do when my job ends in two weeks, I won’t have that income and I’d have way too much time off (I can’t sit around too long, I need work). Well, my boss goes to the same LDS ward (church) as my family and my mother and my boss’ wife got talking. Well, it wasn’t long that it got back to my boss and he told me I could stay as long as I needed to. I wouldn’t be surprised if he offered me my job back once I returned home, but that’s another decision I don’t want to think about.

I’m more confused on what to do with my pathetic life as ever. Hopefully once this first trip comes around and I actually get to go, I’ll get to relax and think things over. Sorry for the rambling, but my mind feels like it’s in the spin cycle.


Quirky Quote: Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained. ~Arthur Somers Roche